Finding My Voice in English
Anonymous
I was really excited when my mom and dad started talking about going to America. I thought it would be interesting and fun to move to another place. There would be new adventures and memories. Although I would be leaving all my friends and family, I thought it would be pretty easy to meet new friends in this new place.
My last day of school in my country was full of drama. My teachers were giving me advice about things that I shouldn't forget when I got here. My friends were recounting funny memories, and laughing over the most embarrassing stories we've been through. They also gave me a small party and some things to remember them by.
Afterwards, while I was packing my clothes with my grandmother, I saw tears pouring down her eyes as she folded my clothes. At this moment, I realized that I was really going to leave her and our place. It became very emotional when we had our last dinner at our old house. I couldn't even look in my friends' eyes, because I was afraid that I would start crying with them, especially when it was time to say bye-bye. Yet we enjoyed the party, and didn't mind that I was leaving.
When I arrived here, I was amazed with the place and people. In fact, I felt amazed for a second, because it was really different from our country. The cars were very big and there
are a lot of huge buildings. Also, I could see different kinds of races compared to the people in my country. Surprisingly, it was not really hard for me to communicate, because I could speak a little English.
But I have a different accent, and it made me feel very self-conscious when I talked, because some people made fun of me. For this reason, it was too embarrassing for me to talk. That's why I often mumble when I say things. Even the cashiers in the fast food restaurants kept on shouting impatiently because they could not understand my English. Regrettably, I stopped talking in English for a while, but I realized that I should practice speaking in this language, because it's an important key for my survival in this country.
I believed it would be easy to make new friends in America, because it was easy in my country, but I was wrong. I changed a lot because of the shameful experiences that happened to me. The first day of school at Southern was the most uncomfortable feeling I've been through in my whole life, because they didn't put me in ESOL classes. I didn't
say anything the whole day except my name, because the teachers always said it wrong. It was too awkward for me to talk to people, because when the teacher asked me something, everyone stared at me. They started saying bad things behind my back.
They thought I couldn't understand that much English but they were wrong, I couldn't speak that well, but I knew what they are talking about. I just didn't pay attention to them, but I felt so dumb sitting in the class and not being able to talk. I was really thankful when they put me in the ESOL classes. At least now, I have a lot of new friends that are like me, still adjusting to their new environment.
It wouldn't be so hard for me to adapt to a new place if some people understood my situation. In reality, if there were no bullies I could speak clear English, but I lost my confidence and now I'm moving on to try to get it back and learn English very well. It is really helpful that they have ESOL classes because they can really focus on teaching a student like me, who has poor English. I am still grateful that I went here, because I learned and discovered a lot of things that our country doesn't teach as much, like practicing better English and of course, having a brighter future.
